Tips for Writing Your Wedding Vows

It’s not exactly a walk in the park to write your wedding vows. It’s deeply personal, almost like writing poetry. Add the fact that you will be reading it in front of a group of people watching you and waiting for the wedding rings to be exchanged, it’s kind of scary. However, reading your vows to your future spouse will be one of the most memorable moments in your life. Here are some tips to make sure you make your vows absolutely perfect.

Start Early. You will really regret waiting until the last minute to write your vows. You’ll feel way too pressured to give it the proper thought that needs to go into it. I suggest you start about a month early – right after you’ve decided on vendors for the wedding. A first draft should be put together about 3 weeks early and a final draft should be completed at least two days before the big day.

Look to Tradition. Get inspired – read some traditional vows to see what kind of style works for you.

Set the Tone. What tone are you looking to have in your vows? Funny but sweet? Poetic and romantic? As long as you are staying true to yourself and speaking from the heart, the tone doesn’t matter. However, if you do take the humorous route, remember to acknowledge how serious you are about this lifelong commitment.

Figure Out the Logistics. Make sure you and your future spouse are both on the same page. If you’re writing them individually, are you going to run them by each other before the wedding? If you’re writing them together, will they be completely different for each of you, or will you recite some of the same words and make the same promises to each other? If you want them to be a surprise on your wedding day, make sure you both send a copy of what you’ve written to a friend or family member to make sure your vows are just about the same length and tone.

Schedule Some Alone Time. Take a little time to think about how you feel about your beau. What did you think when you first saw them? When did you realize you were in love? What do you most respect about your partner? How has your life gotten better since meeting your mate? What about them inspires you? What do you miss most about them when you’re apart? What qualities do you most admire in each other? Finding these answers may just lead you to the perfecting words to write.

Steal Ideas. Borrow from poetry, books, religious texts and romantic movies. Write down some words and phrases that represent how you feel.

Create an Outline. Do yourself a favor and establish some structure when you are getting started with your vows with an outline. For example, you could begin by talking about how absolutely wonderful your future hubby is, then how he makes you and your life better, then quote your favorite author, following with the promises you want to make to each other.

Remember Your Audience. Yes, your vows should be personal and intimate, but don’t go making your guests uncomfortable with something embarrassing! You have invited them to hear your vows and make your bond together public, so don’t put in too many inside jokes or code words that will just confuse everyone!

Time It Right. Short but sweet is the way to go, so you may want to try and keep your vows to a minute or less. Make what you say meaningful, saying the things that are most important to you and your relationship. Save the rest of your personal thoughts for the reception toasts, and the wedding night!

Practice Out Loud (Seriously!). You’ll want to do this to make sure everything sounds just as perfect and beautiful as it does in your head. Know how loudly to speak, when to make pauses, what words to make emphasis on. Work around any words that are tongue twisters or sentences that run a little too long.

Take our advice; it will help make your vows just as meaningful and beautiful as you have always hoped. Just remember to relax and speak from the heart; this is a memory that will last forever.

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